Inner Thoughts Out Loud

I hear stupid people

Lady ‘the’ White

Somewhere between taking on a Black Devil (or is it Demon, eh…) Ship and running into a telekinetic force field doing a face plant (he had it coming, funny how I didn’t see it coming) is me. I seem to be courageous some times and such a courageous and powerful goof the next. here I am shouting at an invisible wall like a mime wishing for a better rebuttal than watching him escape my ‘attempt to make cordial conversation’. I can’t help it. I am not sure that I am a free man or not as I serve the god Thoth but am a free agent to fart as I please. We still are here in my old stomping grounds but I cannot tell you much as I really have never been outside of Itomas’ walls. I knew tons of people and family were all there. In a matter of weeks my family has been sold and Adeel has lost his fortune and I am on the lamb (or goat or something). My old master has not heard one chuckle from me but then again… is she looking?

The gang has been fun to be with. I have had some seriously funny experiences. I turned a ‘fireman’s’ voice into a real high pitch voice (that was funny till I was choking for air (then again that was funny too). I did it so I could understand him. He didn’t like the joke. Turns out he was a warlock. Still wonder what a air warlock is doing as a ‘fireman’. Between Asher and I we determined that it must be a short entertainment career.

Let’s see there was no funny business when Xerx’ses got naked (I don’t need to know that the man is pack’n but wow, damn!) up in the crow’s nest some days ago when we were facing the Black Ship, though I warned him and Caminata, who had transformed into a crow (what animal can’t she transform into I mean I would probably get freaky if I wasn’t a ‘complete and honest’ gentleman; what can I say, mom liked me best), not to do any funny business as that’s how harpies are made. That was funny.

I’m sorry Lady ‘the’ White, I am a scatter-brain sometimes. My thoughts are all over the board. I hope to live really long but with the way that these guys live… eh… I am not sure how long I will enjoy freedom. In this new town I played a slave (I hate slavery. I detest slavery. I loath slavery. I… uh… You get the idea). However it has allowed me to use so many voices my favorite I call Schmegal (don’t know why but its fun to refer to myself in the third person). The other voice I enjoy is called I-gor (that’s pronounced ‘I’ gor and it comes with a lot of snorts and a high whinny voice) Though it hurts my throat, especially after smoking and so I don’t do it much.

You want to know a secret? I hear voices when no one is talking. could be Schmegal or I-gor. I am certain that it’s my subconscious attempting to talk to me. You know the voice of reason and logic. I generally threaten to stab it with a Q-tip and it shuts up. Occasionally it’s in the voice of my magic master Wanna; other times it is in the voice of her old master the Master Slapstick. Funny how that voice gets me in trouble. I have done some stupid things that almost cost me my head because of that voice. It seems that being a member of CrIsis has quieted the voice, well, for now. It’s nice to hear my own thoughts in my voice. I am sorry that I really don’t have much to add to the group… for now; they being all seasoned and I am a goof attempting to learn how to play the game (before getting clubbed in the head with the ball) and who the players are (to see how I measure up). Should be interesting.

Burlap.
Written by Burlap on the 18th of Set sometime in the reign of King whats-his-nuts (hey, he don’t know me; I am not going to worry about his (Itomas; yea I know his name) reign, so there…).

Picture from Creepy Pasta Wiki.
 

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