The Hand Job

A Worldly Path

An account to Wolfen Commander Ulrich by Jidian Kulder, of the retrieval of the Left Hand of Osiris from the Jotan Necromancer, Ammetti Besi.


“LEST WE FORGET”

I was here with the Legion of Northmoor and we were deep into the siege when I received a message from U’Selekma informing me of the mission of CrIsis and their urgent need for aid. Luckily for me, you had called a halt before further action would be required, so I knew I had some time to spare. I therefore asked Hobe Bygone to send me across the world for a short time with his powerful magic.

Our good friend Stirling Bridge (who should NOT be forgotten) had previously tried to negotiate the Left Hand of Osiris from the Jotan Necromancer, Ammetti Besi, with disastrous consequences, and CrIsis were heading towards his home in the Isle of the Cyclops town of Trade Port to try and procure the artefact for the Gods of Light.

My whole visit was on the understanding that when I was needed back in the East, I would be recalled, no matter how it went with the fate of the Hand, so I tried to instill some urgency into the mission as soon as I landed on their boat just outside the harbour. Greetings were exchanged and I met some new faces, for as you know, the members of CrIsis are ever changing and you can also imagine my surprise when I saw your brother Raulf as part of the group, who just several days before had been activating ballista for us in the battle against the Supremacists.

*NOBLE LODGINGS*

“PASS ME A NIGHTGOWN”

Information gathering and sightseeing in a strange town during a blizzard are things I would not normally recommend except when dictated by great need. Although I had been to this place a hundred years hence, much can change in that time, not least of which, the populace. The beautiful Elvin druid Caminata scoured the place in bird form, the intrepid Kobold mystic, Asher, probed even deeper in astral form and we all entered the town in disguise. The minotaur wizard Xerx’ses took the form of cruel noble lord, Osric, and played his part with such conviction that I am convinced penance is due; and your brother Raulf played the part of a dog and was not cowed by the fact of being kept in a cage. Many times I raised my rod to him on instruction of the “evil Osric” but he played the part and whimpered convincingly. I pray you do not mock him over this when you next meet.

Of the other members of the subterfuge, Burlap the hobgoblin remained suitably ludicrous and I was surprised to see that old Air Warlock mage, Tyvernos. Don’t ask me how it came to be that he lived for I do not know and he did not say, but it was definitely him for he is as chaotic as ever. He even chose a tit as one of his disguises. The servant of Isis, Indaris, also was there, noble as ever and deep in prayer whenever not in battle.

We stayed at the most expensive hotel and I am ashamed to say I embarrassed myself in the lounge in my evening dress trying to ingratiate those hoighty-toighties with my effete performance. Never shall I live that day down, but I tell you this because you will know how against the grain this will sit with me, and it may convince you of our need, thereby strengthening your resolve to say nothing of your brother’s charade when you next meet.

*SILENT STEP*

“LITHOS UNLEASHED”

We were still looking for a way forward when I spied this young rascal sneaking out of the hotel with a guilty look on his face. You know how I hate that look, and how I despise it; so I followed him in great stealth and with a cloak of invisibility wrapped around me by one of my esteemed colleagues. He went into a barracks, and I slipped in to listen as he spoke directly to the commander and told him that he had discovered CrIsis in town. Our disguises were blown! I immediately bolted to warn my fellows but it was here that Set played a part, for in my haste, I slipped on a snowflake, twisted my ankle and crashed into a pile of halberds that came tumbling down, revealing my position. As the young gamers of Lopan might say, “I had rolled a ONE!”.

Desperate was my escape and so quick and intensive their chase that I had no alternative but to drastic action, and had to loose the mighty arrow Lithos into their midst.

Fly like eagle, rock and storm, oh mighty Lithos fly,

Come wind, come rack, come hail of stones attack,

And scream thee short, but scream thee loud, mine enemies that die.

Ne’er again will I see its like, yet by its mighty power was I saved, to bring the news to CrIsis, who had now found the dwelling place of the Jotan Necromancer himself and were already approaching.

*DELIVERANCE*

“NECROMANCING”

I could spend hours telling you of how we deliberated a plan and you would hear many conflicting ideas to which all vigorously contributed but in the end I think one might credit the illustrious Asher with the pivotal element of dropping a heavy weight from an extremely high altitude onto the roof of the building, with all further action dependent on its result. Well, its result, I might tell you, was spectacular but it took so long to engineer, that in the preparation, our magical quarry was able to escape. However, one does not simply Dimension Door away from CrIsis!

We soon had a new fix on our target and this time, with the help of one of Caminata’s giant insects, we burst down the door and went straight in. Raulf was bravest of all and spearheaded the attack, taking mighty damage from magical wards, but never stopping until he faced the giant necromancer with his weapon and struggled in combat with the creature. Soon both he and Indaris were engaged in the conflict, so powerful was this creature that it easily took on both opponents with one hand, for in its other was the LEFT HAND OF OSIRIS. I flew in to the room, for a phantom held me aloft in the air, and I loosed a mighty arrow of gnome magic into the very heart of the Jotan enemy. Twice I fired, and mighty was the twang that released those bearers of death. Yet sharp was the blade of Raulf that cut the evil head from that wretched creature.

Who took the LEFT HAND OF OSIRIS I cannot say, for there was much confusion in that time, but CrIsis saved the day and we made good our escape, teleporting all to safety. I was taken first by Xerx’ses to Sekti-Abtu before returning here. So now you have the tale. I did not see Raulf in the very end but he is now a part of one of the most revered groups of people that I know on this planet. You should be very proud of him, My Lord.

Jidian Kulder
Legion of Northmoor

Bridge picture source: Education Scotland
“Inn” picture source: The Sun UK
Hailstorm picture source: Home ‘n About
Necromancer picture source: Good Reads

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